Slippery Tipples
By Joseph Piercy
From European favourites such as Mastichato Chios, which saved 2,000 Greeks from a bloody massacre at the hands of vengeful Turks, to legendary drinks such as Amarula, invented by African elephants; from classic cocktail ingredients like Midori, the bright green Japanese melon drink launched at the wrap party for Saturday Night Fever at Studio 54, to Jägermeister, dreamt up by a confidant of Herman Goring and hugely popular among senior Nazis, Slippery Tipples tells the stories behind the world’s most extraordinary drinks.
Every self-respecting home bartender should have a proper cocktail handbook stashed in the liquor cabinet whether they want to create basic drink recipes or masterpieces of mixology. Slippery Tipples is in no way your average bartender’s guide. Instead, Joseph Piercy takes us on an entertaining journey to discover some of the world’s most “delectable, disgusting and dangerous drinks that made history.” Though certainly not a comprehensive guide to international hooch, it highlights the historical significance behind 40 spirits and liqueurs with somewhat unusual or nefarious pasts.
The selection of spirits runs the gamut from Hpnotiq, the relatively new hip hop club scene favorite, to Unicum Zwack, an herbal remedy created to cure a Holy Roman Emperor’s stomach cramps. Each beverage’s background is scattered with rich cultural context, curiosities, and Piercy’s sly humor. He supplies enough ammo to piss off the self-righteous teetotalers by detailing numerous high-octane spirits brewed by seemingly reverent monks and nuns. I am now biting at the bit to tell some drunken footballer he is downing “Goring-Schnapps” after he slams a Jäger Bomb at the pub.
Piercy’s wry wit shines through his amusing tasting notes and “good for” suggestions. He clearly dissuades all but the most adventurous readers from sampling certain spirits by comparing them to the likes of urine samples, mildewy battery acid, world-class laxatives, and a revolting can of condensed milk and rum left to rot in the sun for a few days. Yum.
Cocktail recipes are provided for most of the slippery tipples. A few of the cocktails, such as the Classic Harry Yee Blue Hawaii, can be found at any local dive bar or lounge and are mundane enough for the average imbiber. Other recipes are based on revolting drinks (unless fermented mare’s milk makes you swoon), yet posses utterly intriguing names such as the Long, Slow, Cabbage in the Dark or The Golden Horde. A few concoctions are so titillating that I am tempted to track down the proper liqueurs just so I can savor the expressions when I serve up a Sowetan Toilet.
Many of the international spirits and liqueurs listed are impossible to find locally. The creamy Wonka Bar sounds divine, but, surprisingly, I could not find any Israeli Sabra at my mega wine and liquor store. Others, such as the ancient French “demon drink” Chartreuse (the recipe for which is still fiercely guarded by reclusive monks), were beyond my budget with price tags climbing over $70 a bottle.
Instead, I chickened out and went with the safe, Southern Italian specialty limoncello. Piercy states some drinks taste better in situ, and I completely agree. We both discovered limoncello while honeymooning in Italy (unbeknownst to each other, of course). There is nothing like sitting in an Italian cafe and savoring exquisite after dinner digestivo. It tastes like pure sunshine in a shot glass; it leaves you with a slight afterglow, as if you have been kissed by the sun. At home, it is still a tasty treat, but it can never live up to the exalted experience lurking in my travel memories.
Blueberry Puppy Dogs
10cl limoncello
2cl lemon juice
2cl simple syrup (sugar and water mix)
1 cup of blueberries
10cl carbonated water
A delightful frozen cocktail for hot summer afternoons. In a blender or with a hand blender mix the blueberries with lemon juice, simple syrup, and limoncello until they form a rough slush. Add the carbonated water and freeze for two hours. When ready to serve thaw for twenty minutes and spoon the icy slushy mixture into tall glass. Drink with a straw and maybe garnish with a sprinkle of chopped blueberries.
-From Slippery Tipples by Joseph Piercy
This treat was surprisingly tart at the first sip but intoxicatingly tasty. I could easily become trashed without realizing how much alcohol I was sipping (or spooning depending on the frozen consistency), considering the recipe calls for about three shots of limoncello per one large serving. Some limoncello is made with vodka (as called for in the recipe listed in the appendix), while some is made with grain alcohol (as I make it). Three shots can knock a nominal drinker silly. Enjoy with care, or be prepared for the hangover tomorrow.
Even a teetotaler with an interest in quirky trivia and historical antidotes can make use of this book. Piercy’s tantalizing tidbits are sure to knock the often tired and trite cocktail party conversations up a notch. This delightful tome would also make a thoughtful gift for bon vivants, trivia buffs, and casual tipplers to enjoy.
Buy It.RIGHT NOW. Then give as a gift. You’ll be the hit of the party.
