I knocked on the door of the alchemist and waited. After a few moments, did the voice of an old man call out from inside, “Come inside. Its open.” I did as was asked of me and found a surprisingly large room which was filled with flasks, chemical equipment and an open fire in the middle with a hunched over man in front. The man was staring into the fire as if awaiting something. The old man looked extremely focused, so I decided to just quietly wait. I glanced at the things around me but avoided touching anything, since it just seemed dangerous to touch any exposed ingredients or substances.

  I waited for around ten minutes until the alchemist pulled something out of the fire with his bare hands. They looked burned and scarred but still I could not see a single sign of any shaking at all. The old alchemist stared at the thing he had pulled out of the fire and turned around to put it into a box that was standing on a desk nearby. I guessed that it was a pill judging from the indentation in the box. I finally got a good look at the man. He was constantly hunched over with long brown robes that reached to the floor covering his back. Only his forearms were not covered in the robes, though I could not tell if he had rolled the robe up or if it had been designed like that. The arms were covered in similar scars to the hands, with the scars almost completely disappearing after covering half the forearms.

  The alchemist finally spotted me and almost dropped the pill. “How long have you been here?” The voice of the alchemist sounded genuinely shocked. He recovered after a moment and asked, “Who are you and what do you want?” Before he could ask anything else, did I interrupt, “I am the direct disciple of Elder Garlou, Miranda. I wanted to ask, if elder could make the pills for my body purification. And lastly, I have been here for around ten minutes, since elder invited me in.” The alchemist finally seemed to remember and put away the pill and cleared a chair, offering it to me. After I sat down, did he ask, “Show me your body cultivation manual first and tell me if you have consumed or received anything else regarding cultivation. Be it pills or the personal Qi of your master.”

  I stared at the man. It seemed like an excessive amount of information, especially considering that it would expose my biggest weakness. Or at least the biggest one I would have in the future. I decided to probe the man a bit before I would decide to hand him such a secret, “Since this would expose everything about how my cultivation will work, is there a way to guarantee that you won’t talk?” The alchemist began laughing but stopped after seeing that I had been serious. “Girl, why do you worry about such things? I promise I won’t talk. Why are you so worried?”.

  It was true, that most likely nobody outside of the sect would ever hear about my weakness if I told the alchemist. But the problem was that there always was a chance that I would one day need to go against the sect to progress faster. I could not explain that, so I made up another reason which sounded plausible, “Since, I hopefully, will get rather strong with time and we are an orthodox sect, do you not think that maybe the demonic cultivators will kidnap you. Or something like that. To be honest I just want to be on the safe side, since I have a rather big trade off in my manuals, according to Master.”

  This finally seemed to turn the alchemist serious, and he began to walk through the laboratory searching for something. After a few moments, did he return with a small pill. He then said, “This is a heart devouring pill. It is mostly used on spies. If you fill it with intent, similar to a technique, it will enforce that intent as best it can, more often than not killing the person who took it if they go against it. In your case, fill it with the intent to keep a single secret from you and I will take the pill afterwards. Just make sure that the next secret you tell me is your manual.” He then handed me the pill.

  It felt as heavy as a metal ball and almost looked like it. It had a faint green shimmer underlining the metallic colour. I then began to concentrate on the intent, I wanted to engrave into the pill. I tried my best to clear my mind of all thoughts and just focus on a single thing, while I slowly let my earth Qi flow into the pill. The alchemist was to keep the weakness of my cultivation a secret no matter the cost. I repeated that sentence over and over again in my mind and tried my best to push that will into the pill.

  The pill began to change from its previously metallic colour with the green undertones to a bright red. It also started to look less like a metal ball and formed some small deformities. The transformation of the pill only took a few seconds, and the old alchemist took the pill from me and began to inspect it. He seemed satisfied and said, “Since I forgot to introduce myself properly. I am Evael Rescla, first of my name.” With this, did the old man swallow the pill.

  I immediately handed him the manual Master had made me, while keeping contact with it pouring Qi into it, to keep it open. It contained “Against nature”, after I had asked Master to add it as well. He skimmed through it in a manner of seconds, while I held my tongue to avoid accidentally wasting the pill on some other secret. It only took Evael a minute or so to read through it again, while making notes as he went. He finally let go of the manual, allowing me to take it back, and I said, “Thank you for being so accommodating.” Evael just waved it off and said, “With manuals like that, I can understand why you wanted to be careful.”

  He then went over to the paper he had written his notes down on, “There are a few options of what I can make for you. The first would be the fastest. You would take the poison for around two weeks or so and would have full active control over your body. After that would just be the detox process like usual. The second option is that you take a few different poisons, that will lead to the same result. It will just take a few months, but on the positive site, you would develop a resistance against most poisons.”

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  He stopped for a moment to gather his breath and finished, “The last one, is essentially the same, just with a lower dose per day. The detox would also take longer. Which one do you prefer?” While he talked, did he begin to gather a few materials while I thought. I then asked, “Are there any downsides to going with the first option?” Evael continued gathering materials, “Just the risk of death, since you would need to actively breathe and beat your heart until it becomes an unconscious action.”

  I sighed, knowing that I would take the riskier pill. I had already decided to risk my life fighting, so what difference did it make to also risk my life while cultivating. I didn’t want to take the pills that would help me develop a resistance against poisons, since I could always modify my body to achieve the same. I wanted a completely empty canvas of a body to start modifications on. I then said, “I will take the first option.” Evael just continued doing his work, without even looking up, seemingly having anticipated this response.

  I decided to ask a question I had since I first read about body purification, “What exactly is the difference between the current state of my body and afterwards? It sounds like I will do most things unconsciously either way.” The alchemist began to pulverize some of the ingredients he had gathered while he talked, “The biggest difference is control. You can always pull the actions which you perform subconsciously to the front of your mind and control them. For example, you could lower your heartrate if you are nervous before a fight to calm down, or you could increase it to get more blood flowing. I don’t really know how its used for fights, but you get my point.”

  I nodded and asked, “How long will it take to make these pills? Also, how will the detox process work?” The old alchemist began to throw the prepared ingredients into the fire and stared at it, “The poison will be ready in around ten minutes. I will also start making the things you need for the detoxification. But that will take longer, so I will only have it prepared in a week. Come to me when you achieved complete control. You will know when it will be time, when you can stop your heart. Also, do test that out first before coming back. It’s the last defence mechanism of the body and will ensure that you completed it.”

  I waited quietly, reading through my manuals again, for the rest of the time it took Evael to make the poison. Though I didn’t see anything new, did it help me burn the instructions in my heart. The old alchemist handed me a box with twenty pills inside. He said, “Take one each day. If you get close to using them all, come visit me again. Although I doubt that it will be necessary, since you are not from a noble family and don’t have an already strong body.”

  I thanked him and made my way back to Master with the pills in hand. She was doing the same exercises again, so I went to the point, “I got the poisons from the alchemist Evael Rescla. He will also prepare the detoxification. He swallowed a heart devouring pill after I infused it with the intent of keeping my weakness a secret. Does the pill actually enforce the will that was infused into it?”

  Master stopped her practice and walked over to me. She took the box out of my hand, inspecting the pills the alchemist had made me, before she said, “If its Evael, then I believe he actually took a heart devouring pill. He tends to be crazy enough to do that. Anyway, start taking a pill immediately. I see nothing wrong with them. After you regain a bit of control over your body, will I send you on another mission.” She handed me the box back, while I was getting a bit worried about what she meant with me losing control over my body and going on a mission. I understood that it was most likely hard at the beginning to control your body if everything you did unconsciously gets put to the forefront of your mind, but doing a mission while in such a state seemed extremely risky.

  Which is why I immediately took one of the pills. I wanted to be prepared to fight while poisoned and every training opportunity counted. I closed the lid of the box before I forced the pill down my throat. It was tasteless, which was a pleasant surprise. Then a strange sensation overcame me. I felt the pill dissipating in my stomach. Then this strange feeling spread through my body and I became aware of everything that happened within my body. It was a strange but exhilarating experience.

  I felt all the movements of my stomach, chest, throat and mouth each time I took a breath or exhaled. I felt my fingers tightening ever so slightly more around the box. I heard the faint sounds of my breathing, which normally got blocked out by my brain. I could feel my heart pumping. I could feel it accelerating when my attention wandered to it. I felt saliva built up in my mouth, I felt it slide down my throat when I swallowed. And I marvelled at the muscles that were present in my mouth alone.

  Then I tried to crouch down to place the box down, since I still felt I had some clarity left in my mind. It was not like the poison actually clouded my mind. Instead, it just sent a barrage of information to it. The movement of crouching down felt awkward and wrong, since I never actively thought about it. I felt my vocal cords moving and trying to produce a sound. It felt extremely strange to feel the vocal cords to such a degree. I stopped the vibrations and tried to direct my mind back at the task at hand.

  The muscles in my hand moved slightly, and I felt the veins being pushed around slightly by the bones. I felt the blood pumping through them. I felt my eyes getting dry and closed my eyelids. It was a surprising struggle to properly move the eyelids, since they were no longer in synch with each other. As soon as my eyes closed, did I feel the small muscle movements my body had been doing, to keep my balanced. I felt my self toppling over.

  I flayed around to stop it, but couldn’t keep that up for long, as my attention was drawn to the movements of my arm muscles. I fell flatly onto my back, feeling the air being pressed out of them. I managed to open my eyes and stared at the sky. Nothing was damaged, that much I was sure of. I could feel the small strains the fall had put on my body, but nothing that worried me.

  I managed to calm down a bit, now that my entire body was grounded. I then started to feel my body step by step. I started at my feet and slowly worked my way up as methodically as I could. I tried my best to not get distracted by feelings in the upper parts of my body as I worked my attention along. I didn’t know how long it took me until I finally reached my head, but I had felt my heart beat over seven thousand times. The head had been the most distracting part of my body, since it had most of the senses on it.

  After having inspected my entire body, did I try to move with intent. I moved the muscles in my upper body and arms to lift the box slightly up from my chest. Then I slightly turned my body and flexed my back muscles slightly to lift my body up a bit to allow myself to turn. With that, did I manage to place the box next to myself on the ground. I then slowly released each finger from the box. I then tried to speak, which turned out to be extremely troubling, since it required precise control over muscles I had never controlled while being aware of it. I needed to control my lungs, vocal cords, tongue, jaw and lips simultaneously.

  It took me a few more hundreds of heartbeats, until I managed to form a sentence, “Is mission good idea?” I had reduced the to as little as possible and had slurred them, but Master still seemed to understand them, since she answered, “Don’t worry too much, it will get better with more time. The brain is extremely good at adapting. I assume that you will need around three more hours to be able to walk again. I expect you to be ready in around five hours. If you are hungry, tell me and I will get you a nourishment pill.”