PART TWO u – the Bad Thing

  We id there tired. I idly asked what the ball's name was.

  "Teddy Ball. I also call him Ted, and Tedward."

  "Makes sense. Instead of a Teddy Bear, you had a…"

  "Yeah. A Teddy Ball. So… level with me. How fucked up am I, really."

  "Probably not at all. Did… he talk? Move around on his own."

  "No. I do the voice of the ball."

  "Did… he make you feel better? Or, did he call you a whore, and tell you that you deserved it."

  "Nothing like that. He was the only one on my side."

  "He told you all good things. Good ideas."

  "Mostly."

  "And…"

  "Well. It was his idea. To say goodbye to mom. About the only thing bad he ever told me."

  "Its fine dear. And you, mister. No making fun of Teddy. You understand me?"

  "I would never do that. I just wish he was… Tina Ball, Instead of Ted."

  "Because…"

  "She made me kiss him, and hug him. That's why."

  "I bet you liked it when the girls kissed. Didn't you."

  "Sure."

  "Well? There you go."

  "She made me hug and kiss him. I even had to lick him."

  She got into it.

  "That's right. And you know what else?"

  "I'm afraid to ask."

  "He watched you. Get used. You're lucky he finally allowed you to be finished. And, after our third date? Which you begged pitifully for, and I finally felt sorry for you, and said yes, I might add."

  "I'm still afraid to ask."

  "You, are getting sent to my room when we're alone. And… I run a little rape clinic, you know. He's going to watch. Give me ideas, what I do next. I'm going to make you hug him, and kiss him, and lick him. Tell him you how much you love him. While I'm doing the dirtiest things imaginable to you. And when I'm finally done with you, and let you go? You can y there crying, and I'm going to make you tell him all about it. All the dirty things, the bad girl made you do."

  I couldn't help getting in on it.

  "I got an idea. Make him… you know. Hump it. And finish. Then? You should probably make him clean his mess up."

  "Honey? You're not helping."

  "Actually? I will be… helping. Just her, not you. That's her therapy. She runs her own little rape clinic. And I'm sending you there. For treatment."

  Light got back into the swing of the jokes.

  "Yeah. You thought rape jokes, were funny? We'll see how funny you think they are then. When you're crying yourself to sleep. Telling the ball, all about it."

  "You girls ever hear of good cop, bad cop routine? Thought having two girlfriends, might be more like that."

  Light giggled.

  "Pffft. Which one of us is supposed to be the good one. That must be you, Hurry."

  "Light? Ask him and if he doesn't admit, he's lying. I've fucked him to tears before. He loved every minute of it, and he begged for more."

  "Well then, Wizzy. I don't know what you think you heard about me, but… if you were expecting good girl, bad girl? You're going to be sadly mistaken, little boy. This game, seems to be bad girl, bad girl. I'm gonna have to get another little Teddy, I see."

  I asked what a "little Teddy" was.

  "Well. You remember the little balls they sell at the gift shop?"

  "Oh yeah. The key rings. I had a soccer ball key ring."

  "I had one too. My one boyfriend? He used to put it in my mouth. You know, keep me quiet? He put a longer string on it, to repce the short one. He used to tie it in, and go to town. I liked it. It was hot. That one? Was fun."

  "You. Listening? Ears open, mister. Part of Lightning's therapy? Is she needs to learn its okay to accept little gifts from a boyfriend. She needs to learn that doesn't make her a whore, that its perfectly fine. You? Are going to buy her one. Then beg, until she accepts it. We understand each other?"

  "Lightning? I will be honored, to buy you a little Teddy Ball. And I'll even put a longer string on it. So I can tie it in your mouth, then take you hard from behind. It will be my pleasure."

  "Ha. Little Teddy? Is going into your mouth, Wizzy. I've seen how much noise she gets you making. Me and Hurry? Are going to have a little… competition. See who can make you scream louder."

  I couldn't help it.

  "I'll pitch in, and get a couple of them, put them all on a string. Make one of those… butt, ball, string things."

  "Ha. Good one, Hurry. I'll try not to mix them up."

  "Make him kiss them, Light. Every one. Then… py ball with him."

  "Oh yeah. Definitely. I'll make him hug and kiss Teddy, while I'm doing it."

  "So. Whatever happened to your key ring? Mine, I think the string broke, and it got lost."

  "Um. That little soccer ball?"

  "Yeah…"

  "It… was in my mouth a couple times, like I said. Then… it kinda went somewhere else. Then, you can imagine where it ended up one night. I mean, hello. Its me."

  "You mean…"

  "Mm hmm. Remember, I finally got my hat trick, that one game?"

  "Yeah."

  "Well. That's the boy I was with then. I… kinda got my own hat trick that weekend."

  "Was that the boy, that had you wear your game outfit?"

  "Yeah. That was him. He liked me wearing the uniform. He wanted me to bring a ball with me, too. So? Teddy went with me a couple times. Poor Teddy. He doesn't get out much anymore, like me and him in the old days."

  "Light? Take Teddy with you. On dates. With him. You py soccer, its not weird for you to have a ball with you. Why not."

  "Does the one girl, still work in the gift shop?"

  "Yeah. Its her school job. Why."

  "See if they have a big old box of those little Teddy's. She might be able to give you as many as you want."

  "Oh. Good idea. You get the Little Teddy to keep him quiet, and… I'll make the long string with the rest. Well, we each get a long string Little Teddy on our key chains. You know, so we always have one handy. To keep him… quiet."

  "Hmm. We gonna have a contest?"

  "Who screams him the loudest? Sure."

  "No. Game night. We see who can fit more balls in, and back out. We'll keep score. Leave the record up on my wall. I got the little chalkboard. We'll know what the score means."

  "We can run the string and balls through the washer. No biggie."

  "Its really not what I had in mind, when I got a second girlfriend."

  "Ha. We're gonna py ball with you. You? Are really gonna score. Light? You're gonna get another… hat trick."

  "And then some. If I can get nine in? Hat trick, of hat tricks."

  "Ha. While he's hugging and kissing Teddy."

  "Teddy? He's the ref. He calls the winner."

  "Gee. I thought I was going to come back to our room, honey. For therapy from you. To help me deal with this."

  "Pffft. I won't believe you. In fact… if you give her any problems? I'm gonna bring the belt down. We'll make you. How's Teddy about crying?"

  "He's heard me cry before. Trust me. He's heard plenty."

  "There, you see? You can do what you're supposed to, or… you can do it with a sore ass."

  "Well, when we start keeping score? He's gonna have a sore ass anyways. When you think about it."

  "If I have to tattoo my team number on him? Fine. His ass can be sore inside and out."

  He feigned shock.

  "I can't believe I'm sitting here. Listening to you two discuss this. Its like I'm not even here."

  Light teased him.

  "I never knew therapy? Could be so much fun…"

  She started kissing him, stopping to tease him, then going back to it.

  "You're not allowed to tell. You get in trouble for that…"

  "Gonna call the cops? Tell them all about what the bad girls do to you? Ha. They'll ask for our phone numbers…"

  "If you tell anyone else? They'll think you're making it up. Or bragging… and you still get in trouble, for telling…"

  "But, you'll probably be embarrassed, to tell about all the stuff we do. We're gonna use you, like the town slut. And you? Are gonna love every minute of it…"

  "And when you cry? Well. I'll loan you Teddy. You can tell him all about it."

  We fell asleep, with him in the middle, between us. Those two fell asleep, facing each other. I sidled up behind him. In the early morning, I woke up and beat the arm, like usual. I gently shook Light awake. She kissed his head without waking him up, and got her clothes. She gently got Teddy off of him. They had both slept with him between them.

  "Come on, Ted. Back to our room."

  She smiled and waved. I told her softly, to come back after breakfast, so he could dress us. She pointed at him, and said to tell him she had fun. I smiled and shook my head yes, I would. After she stole out and went back to her room, so she could pretend to come out of it for breakfast. I thought about it.

  I had read about "sex therapy" being done. I had always thought it was some kind of game to have extra partners, and call it therapy. Maybe some kind of excuse, to have fun and save face. It probably was that, but… there were probably a few doing it for real.

  I hadn't known about Teddy Ball. She was being honest for therapy. I was surprised. Very few people have the personality type, to spend a lot of time alone and it doesn't bother them. And even then, it might not be optimum for them. And, there's a difference. Between choosing to be alone, and working on yourself. Or having it foisted upon you, like had been done to her. Just when she needed friends and family most? She had nothing and nobody. She sat around for four years, talking to a soccer ball. It was her best friend, and she imagined the ball telling her what they were going to do.

  And trust me, I caught some things in there. Teddy was a soccer ball. He liked being kicked. Her mother lost the ability to turn her out, and earn money off of her. Then after she cashed out for the st big payday? She had no further use for her daughter. If she wasn't going to get pregnant, and double her welfare income. If she wasn't going to get whore-d out any more. Then, mom had no other use for her anymore. Well, she kicked her around sometimes. That was about it.

  Teddy was a soccer ball. He liked being kicked. Lightning had to learn to "like" getting kicked, too. Did she settle on soccer as her main deal, because she got to kick something all day and night, practicing and pying. The harder and more accurately she kicked, the more praise she got. Ted the soccer ball was her only friend, and he got her through those four years. He made her feel useful and powerful. She got very good at kicking. Four years learning to be the best at it. She was a star.

  Ted honed her legs and feet into powerful and accurate things. She was the best soccer girl at her school, hands down. She was the best in her county. Then the best in her state. She got sent to the national all star series, and led her team to victory. Ted couldn't have done any more for her. Kicking for years. Then Ted told her. We have to say goodbye to mom, and let her know how much we're going to miss her.

  I wonder if that was the pn all along. To be able to kick her mom back, finally. Couldn't bme her if it was. I doubt a jury would even convict her. Not once they heard the whole long, sordid story.

  Teddy Ball. I'm going to make you the best, honey. And we're getting out of here, and never coming back. She arguably was one of the best graduating high school that year, maybe the best. She led her team to victory in the big final series. She even got national coverage for her dramatic winning goal, and getting hurt so bad doing it. That clip was famous. In pro football terms? She was kind of a first round draft pick. When the coach showed me who he had interested? I couldn't believe it. He was glowing and beaming, he was pulling it off.

  The coach had zeroed in on Right, as his big star he was courting at that moment. When Little Lightning herself just showed up, expressing previous interest? He about shit himself with glee, and did his happy dance.

  She was too good. The older girls were jealous and hated her. Then she found me, and I found her. I guess I feel honored. I was the first human, she looked up to and trusted to take care of her. I repced a soccer ball. Her whole life, fit into two big gear bags. A backpack, and a shoulder bag. And Teddy Ball. He rode with her on the bus, to get here. She probably talked to him the whole way. We did it, Ted. We made it. We escaped. Thanks, I owe it all to you. Probably kissed and hugged him, while people watched and made the circur motion at their head, with the finger. Pretty, but koo koo.

  Teddy Ball probably had his own seat next to her on the bus, when he wasn't in her p. He lived in her room with her, she slept with him every night. Before every game, he probably came and sat on her p. He taught her to get the bloody jeans out, the tainted wham bam and get lucky. We stare at it, and we get good and pissed. We control it. Then? We unleash that on the enemy. That's how we do it, kid. Me and you.

  It was really something to see the 14 year old girl in her, all excited to be able to get into a car with a boy she trusted. She could learn to go on a date again. She didn't argue when I told him to buy her a Little Ted key chain. She could slowly learn to take small gifts, that wasn't being paid for sex, that was normal. She could talk about it now, without going to complete pieces. She was figuring out what the difference between sex and love was.

  To anyone else, your first love is family. She had nothing but a memory of a long gone father, and just her mom. And if that was love, what her mother did? Monkeys are gonna fly out of my ass. And I don't see any monkeys filing flight pns, so. Just when she was at the stage where you're being prepared to experience sex and attraction, the stage is set. For you to hopefully learn what love is. How sex is a part of the whole love package. But, her mom put a stop to that. Ruined her at 14.

  She was supposed to be a dancer. Those legs? They were made for dancing. She told me once, her dance name, at her dancing school? The girls all get a name. The teacher and the other girls, nicknamed her Sky. She said she got it, because when you dance, you learn to leap. You want more air, to make it more dramatic, and you have more time to do things before you come down. Apparently, they named her Sky, because she could get higher. The other kids, not just on her dance team called her Sky as well. Because it was on her T shirts, and dance bag, and everything else.

  Then? She was called "slut" and "whore" for four years. But Teddy Ball changed that for her. She earned a new name. Little Lightning. Light, most people called her. And yeah, a few "whore" comments. She'll correct you on that though. I'm a slut, I'm not a whore. Get it right. Teddy Ball even got her another name. Little Miss Two Feet. Because her weak leg and foot, is damn near as strong and as accurate, as her strong one. She can use it to her advantage, too. She can fool her opponent, into watching her weak foot. Then, when it counts? She can surprise them with her strong side.

  I guess from dancing, she loved the roller skating rink. She had me take her roller skating once, and it was something to see her go. She can naturally dance on the damn things. Forwards, backwards, at will. She can go fast, and turn and stop on a dime. Do spins and take offs. She can go fast, too. In the middle of the skating rink time, they let the people that can speed skate, do it. Everyone clears out, and only the people that go fast, are allowed out for a little while.

  Those long legs stretch out, and she really gets moving. From dancing, and then sports? She's flexible. She can be skating, and just go into a split and limbo under about anything. They have a limbo time there, too. But the speed skating is impressive. The owners have a couple kids that speed skate for a sport, and she's one of the ones that can almost keep up with them, although they're pros and they can edge her out. But, she's there.

  Its when they hit the turns, speed skating, that you have to see it to believe it. They look like they're running sideways, to lean into the cornering. So low to the ground, the best of them… that they show off by touching the floor flying by. They look like street motorcycle racers, they're so low in the corners. Then they explode up the straightaways, and cut the other big round corner.

  She can more or less dance on roller skates, too. Like a figure skater on wheels. The parents that owned the rink, you can about guess the dad's a great skater. He coaches speed and figure skating. When the couple skates come and they py the slow love songs and dip the lights, he came and asked for "this dance". He had fun, his wife got to watch him figure skate with her. Guys old enough to actually be her dad, and she had a ball finally having someone to actually dance on wheels with that knew what he was doing.

  Whoever works the lights, put a little spotlight on them and everyone cpped and whistled when she did spins and jumps and stuff with him. The mom and dad and their kids all loved her, and got her drinks and snacks and they had their little "dance" or "skate" talks. She said if I can ever find a real ice skating rink, I should take her there. She said on wheels was nothing, on ice? She can really get moving fast, and do more dance moves and figure skate on ice easier.

  Her life fit into those two big gear bags, and the shoulder bag and that backpack. Her roller skates and her ice skates came with her. She outgrew her wheels and bdes from a kid dancing, but in high school? She said the one coach let her cut his grass for spending money. She said there was nothing weird, his family was always there with her when she did the grass. He was one of the only people that was male and she trusted. She said his family always had her over now and again, to eat. The mother apparently, bought her first the roller skates for her birthday one year, then the figure skates the next year.

  She said when she was little, boys wanted to try to get a kiss out of her. Sweet and innocent little kid stuff. She said the game was, you can't have a kiss unless you can catch me. And if you saw her speed skating, you can figure out how that was a safe bet for her. She'd about have to "let" the boy catch up if she really wanted to give him a quick little peck. She says she's even faster on ice, and I can't even picture that, but I doubt she's lying about it.

  If I ever find one and get her there, I'm sure that family will want to buy her drinks and snacks and talk to her as well. The dad will probably want to figure skate with her, and whoever works the controls will likely put another spotlight on her when she does her thing.

  When they announce the team one at a time, they use our nicknames and our numbers. She's announced as… "and starting at right wing, stand out freshman… the Pride of the Midwest… Little Miss Two Feet… our own… Little Lightning!"

  Her mom took it all away from her. But Teddy Ball? He gave it back to her, and made her a star once again.

  Sky. Whore. Light. Slut. I started affectionately calling her "Dorothy", for obvious reasons. Its been getting trimmed to just "Dot" tely. For Halloween st year? She dressed up as, you guessed it, like there was any real chance it was going to be anything else. Dorothy. This year? She wants to rent a "real" Dorothy costume. Get the hair and makeup just right, everything.

  She's been joking with Wizzy, she wants him to spend the time to make a "real" tin man costume. Not cardboard and tin foil like everyone else does it. Find some sheet metal, and make a real one. He asked me, and I told him I'd see about it. She's got Right almost talked into being either the scarecrow, or the cowardly lion. She can't pick one over the other, which is cuter to go as. I asked her what I was then, joking. She said I had to be the pretty witch, the good witch.

  What the hell. She can teach us all the cute swishing sideways dance, and we can do the scene, right out of the movie.

  I can just picture the three of us, having a threesome on the bed like that. Dorothy, getting it on with the tin man and the good witch of the east. Now that, would be a fucked up fairy tale, wouldn't it? You could sell some tickets to that one.

  At least I got my head screwed on right, good and early. It started out, I wanted to share him, with my bestie and roomie. For fun. Like I never have, that other girls get to. It was for me. But now? It isn't anymore. Its for her. She deserves it, and she can learn what a decent retionship is supposed to be like. How its supposed to feel. What love is, and what it isn't.

  And therapy. It started out, it was for me. I was going to show that I could do it. I was going to "fix" her and make it all better, and be the star. I got that out of my head quick though. Its about her, and her getting better. Its not for me.

  I got everything together, so far. Few ups and downs, but… shaping up nicely. Me and him? We're great. Light's even starting to do better, I can see it and feel it, I can hear it in her voice. She's unstuck, and can begin to grow emotionally again. Another season's coming, and we're going to be even better this year. Because as Light and Right improve year to year, with experience under their belts? We might make it.

  Everything's looking up.