It didn't take long to realize that my mother didn't love me like a son but as a prized possession. I was something that she could use for her control and desires. As her son, I was her ticket to possessing power...and when I realized this, I didn't care. I wanted to be loved in any shape possible. I would've done anything for her. I only wanted to hear her say, "I love you." But I never did. Even till this day, I have yet to hear those 3 words from her.

  The first time I heard those words spoken to me was by my best Kitayana Akkirain and Aalackai Klemen on my 10th birthday. I think their words to me that day were what triggered my 2nd gender profile to awaken. It was like a warm rush of wind wrapped around me and held me in its embrace. I imagined how someone who loves you would hug you.

  The first time I met them, it wasn't because I wanted to. My mother's maids loaded me up into a carriage. They handed me a note from my mother stating the importance of making friends with other children from pure bloodlines, which I interpreted as making alliances. After all, either Kitayana or Aalackai would become my future marriage spouse. I doubt that at the time they knew what it meant to become a princess's playmate. Being my playmate didn't simply mean playing with toys. It meant that the adults were measuring our compatibility.

  The royal household had expectations. One of them is that I would manifest as an Alpha, and that either Kitayana or Aalackai would manifest as an Alpha or an Omega. This would result in the ideal marriage partner for the royal family.

  Of course. Fate had other plans.

  The Akkirains were known for producing pure-blooded Alphas. While the Klemen were known for the exact opposite.

  Kitayana Akkirain was expected to manifest as an Alpha. Kitayana and I were alike that way. We are the firstborns. We are the expected heirs of our household. As the crown prince and heir to the Kivoraine throne am expected to be an Alpha. Just like my predecessors before me.

  Aalackai was different from Kitayana, and, he was the third son of the Klemen family. He wasn't expected to be anything. He would've been loved regardless of his 2nd gender profile.

  My Mother and my royal tutors drilled into me the expectations of the Royal Household into my head ever since I could remember my own name. Their expectations were the reason I ate, slept, and breathed.

  Looking back at that now, that was a lot for an 8-year-old to shoulder on their own.

  I don't miss craving my mother's love.

  Instead, I look forward to the day when all 3 of us are reunited again.

  Today's the day my dreams come true...

  The present grabs me forward I hear one of my childhood friends calling my name.

  "Hey, Lilas, are you even listening to me?" Kitayana asked as she stared at me with her piercing dark blue eyes, "Aren't you excited he's coming back after these years? We haven't seen him since he was enrolled in the boarding school." Kitayana paced the room excitedly before she landed on the sofa beside me, "Frankly, I don't understand why they sent him away to a boarding school. When he could've been taught here."

  I let her continue her ramblings, knowing full well she wasn't expecting a response from me. We've talked about this topic countless times over the years. 5 years to be exact. Yet, she still can't get it out of her system.

  I understand why they sent him away, but there's a big part of me that wishes that Aalackai had stayed here with us. We've missed each other's teenage years and who knows what else.

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  "Hey! There you go again. Why aren't you answering meee!"

  "Because you do the talking for both of us."

  "Hey, not true. You just zone out whenever I start talking!" She accuses.

  "Okay, I'll admit it, maybe during the first half of our conversation, I zoned out."

  "See, I knew it!"

  "Yeah, right. Sugar cube. I bet you didn't even notice after 10 minutes passed."

  Smirking, I stood up from the sofa. I ruffled up her fluffy, bright cherry hair.

  "Hey, watch it. Aalackai can't see me like this." She cutely fumed as she fixed her hair using the mirror across the room.

  "Trust me, Love. Aalackai will think you're beautiful either way," I said, winking, "You are Kivoraine kingdom flaming beauty."

  "Hey, stop teasing me!" She shouted.

  "Yeah, yeah. Come on, he's going to arrive any moment now." Kitayana quickly stood up and straightened up her dress, and took my arm out of the sitting room.

  Aalackai is set to arrive any moment now at his family manor. Apparently, he was set to arrive 3 days ago, but there was a delay in his travels.

  Kitayana and I decided it would be best if we stayed the night yesterday at the Klemen manor to make sure we would be here when Aalackai got here today.

  As we approached the manor's front gate, a carriage pulled up. The carriage windows were covered by the dark green curtains. We waited for the doors to open, but seconds turned into minutes.

  "Do you think... he fell asleep in there?" I whispered to Kitayana.

  "Hmm, maybe...well, there's only one way to find out." She let go of my arm and yanked the door open," Wakey, Wakey, sleep head!" She sang.

  Despite our initial ideas of Kai sleeping, he was wide awake. He seemed to be staring off into nowhere.

  "Bop." Kitayana said as she poked Kai's cheek, "Bop." Now moving inside the carriage, she sat on his right.

  All the servants around us were looking at her with amazement and slight shock at her actions.

  "Kitayana...what do you think you're doing?" Kai asked. His voice was deep, smooth, and sounded like it could be a midnight kiss.

  "Bopping you, of course." She replied like it were the most obvious thing in the world.

  "Aalackai, welcome home." I greeted him gently as I slowly pulled Kitayana off the carriage and him. Kitayana wrapped herself around my left arm as we began to walk all together.

  "I'm home." He whispered as he stepped out of the carriage. He swiped his blackish midnight blue hair back with a white gloved hand. We started to walk to a familiar place.

  I looked him up and down before chuckling out, "I guess I lost that bet."

  "Hm? Which bet?"

  "Right, before you left, we bet on who would grow the tallest, and it seems to me you won."

  "It sure seems that way, doesn't it?" He laughed.

  "Are you sure you didn't use any magic to add a couple of inches to your height?" I asked as all 3 of us took a seat at the flower garden gazebo.

  "Now, now, Lilas's of the 3 of us, we all know you're the one with the magical powers."

  "Then it seems like I must accept my defeat graciously. What would you like as your reward?"

  "Hm, I think I'll collect it later."

  "Alright then." I glanced to my side, and I noticed the redhead was unusually quiet.

  Leading down, I whispered to her, "Are you okay?" Till now, I didn't notice she was clutching my arm tightly, "Are you feeling sick?"

  "No, no, it's nothing I-uh..."

  "Kitayana?" Kai asked, "Are you feeling alright?"

  I sniffed the air for a moment when I realized that there was a sweet scent in the air.

  Shit, why didn't I realize sooner?

  "Kai, it's your pheromones, "I said as I swept Kitayana's bangs from her face. She was warmed to the touch. "Why don't you decrease the amount you're releasing?" Doing as I suggested, Kitayana slowly seemed to look better. She took a couple of deep breaths before she released my arm.

  When I looked over to Kai's face, he looked puzzled.

  "Am sorry, Kitayana, I didn't realize that I was...I assumed that it would be alright since all 3 of us are Alphas..." He said as he trailed off his sentence, "At... the boarding school, it was expected of us to always release pheromones to a certain extent. It's a bad habit now..." Kai explained as he looked away, embarrassed. The tips of his ears blushed red, and he had a glassy look in his eyes, "I'm sorry....am sorry." He looked like he was going to be sick.

  "Hey, it's okay. You did nothing wrong. You don't have to apologize." Kitayana soothed. She moved to his side and hugged him. Kai tensed for a moment before he relaxed into her touch and hugged her too.

  A bad habit....if that was his, then mine would be...

  See here's the thing... We aren't all Alphas here.

  Those of us who should be aren't, and those of us who aren't supposed to be are.