One slime down, time to hunt down the blue one now.

  I chose the most middle one possible.

  Who knows if the oldest one had a speed boost hidden which would make it impossible to catch?

  In the meantime, the red one — which was the smallest of them all — simply disappeared.

  I just hope it didn't die somehow because of me.

  I don't have the gold nor the patience for a trial with the guild.

  I'll just pretend I don't know anything — which I actually don't...

  So, back to the blue blob. It's speed stat was quite ri-donkey-lous.

  I chased after it for a while, but I had no success.

  It simply was faster and sneakier than me.

  I did, however, get to catch a glimpse of it — as it squeezed itself down a hole in the ground.

  I even got to notice a red jelly, which implied that the two were hand-in-hand, and toyed with me while making their escape.

  HOW ARE SLIMES SO INTELLIGENT!?

  I dashed to the hole ASAP.

  It was like a tunnel specifically designed for anti-adventurer encounters.

  Just how high is their INT stat!?

  Anyway, I shoved my hand inside the opening. Luckily, a girl’s hands are thin, so I could fit mine quite easily.

  But it was deeper than I expected. My hand just couldn't reach!

  And just like that the creatures had made their escape.

  SUCCESSFULLY!

  Damnit!

  Back to boredom city.

  Population: me.

  I can’t believe those fuckers escaped so easily!

  I couldn't help but stare at my hand in defeat.

  And now that I looked better at it, I realized that I had the perfect beauty-advertisement arms.

  You ever got to read a beauty magazine? You know, the ones placed on the little glass table inside the waiting hall of a Dentist Clinic? While you're silently waiting for a name call-out?

  I did.

  There was a page talking about long, elegant fingers.

  Apparently “hand model” is a real profession, and by comparison, if such job existed in this world, I'd qualify perfectly.

  Not my dream though!

  My actual goal in life is, and always has been:

  A self-cleaning house, fully paid so I don't have to worry about future taxes and shit.

  A place in which I can laze around all day-every day and do nothing but play games and read Manga.

  I unfortunately had to omit the 'watch anime' part because this world had yet to evolve that far yet.

  But fortunately, since this place wasn't as advanced, I could easily achieve my goal if I rose three or four ranks!

  At that point all payment will be in gold, almost platinum coins!

  Tasks like:

  Kill an ogre.

  Kill an orc.

  Kill a serpento?d.

  Etcetera and etcetera...

  Each with a fat sum attached to the bottom of the page.

  While others chose adventuring to pursue honor...

  Or to pay debts...

  Maybe to take care of loved ones...

  I chose this path for pure arrogance and laziness!

  Back to the boring forest, now.

  I’ve been yapping for a while trying to distract myself from the endless sea of green, but it’s not working.

  I still have my 'subjugate three slimes' quest in order to gain my ID.

  I caught one, so two left.

  It would be so much easier if I could just attack...

  ...

  ...

  Am I stupid?

  I did this last time against the spider too!

  "Oh my god — Satelite, deploy!"

  A ball of fire formed in the air. It started tiny, like a fingernail, but slowly and surely it gathered friction within the atmosphere and grew in size.

  Resulting in a tiny meteorite. It was slightly smaller than a volleyball... but size doesn't mean everything.

  Indeed!

  It's not the size that matters!

  I don't care if I am no longer a man in this life, I stand by that rule!

  The sphere of fire hovered above my shoulder for a moment before slowly beginning to orbit me.

  Stolen novel; please report.

  Just like an actual satellite...

  It circled slowly around my body, patiently awaiting instructions like a loyal pet.

  "Now, Satellite, this is your first task: search for enemies, but do not attack them."

  "I repeat, DO NOT ATTACK!"

  ??ι══════?

  And so Satellite was deployed.

  I won't lie, I'm a bit disappointed that I didn't get to use it right away after unlocking. Nor that I can't test its combat power in my very first quest.

  But once you see how cool this thing looks, you don't really mind it that much.

  “Ehehehehe… shiny ball go vroom.”

  I got a new hobby to drool at, not just hot knights and catgirl abs.

  But even with the satellite deployed — which generously increased my searching area, even with rabbit ears at full sensitivity, I still could not find anything for a long-ass time!

  ???????

  Satellite had long gone away, somewhere deep in the forest like it knew a place.

  I simply, unhurriedly, followed the instincts that told me where it went.

  Just like I open the status window, I also know where the Satelite is. Pretty cool.

  And when I arrived at the spot, I saw the ball of fire hovering in circles 4 meters above the ground.

  I slowly closed the distance until I heard something.

  Observe mode activated!

  Finally!

  Another slime!

  A green one by the way. One that easily blended with its surroundings. If not for Satellite I would've never noticed it. It was really hidden that well between the emerald bushes.

  Wow...

  First launch and it already scored!

  Way to go, Satellite!

  Okay, now how do I catch the thing? I cannot send the comet there to cut off its escape route, I'll set the forest on fire!

  One wrong move and I skip the warnings and jump straight in jail.

  Satellite, you're gonna sit this one out, buddy.

  Now, based on the intel I've received from the receptionist lady, these creatures eat the deceased.

  That's good, I have an idea now, but I need a shovel — which I don't have, but I have imagination.

  And after learning form my mistakes twice, I now know how to dig an easy hole.

  Hole!

  No? How about...

  Collapse!

  That's okay, because I know the next one'll work!

  Remove rock!

  ...

  Tunnel!

  ...

  Create hole?

  ...

  I bet I looked like a maniac talking to the ground, alone, in a forest...

  Dude, I'm trying to find a spell that can dig in the ground, okay? There has to be one, just like the fireball callback.

  I just don't seem to have any success...

  I swear rock and tunnel should've worked out, but nope.

  Okay, lemme try one more time, using the name of a basic ability from a game I played in my past life.

  ? Arcana Discovered!

  【Dig】

  Lv. 1

  Cost: 8% Max Mana

  Description: create a hole in the ground, or similar terrain, with a maximum depth of 5m.

  Nice, good, but... Why's the cost so high? I get that it scales, still! Is it because I'm leveling up and the abilities' price evolves aswell?

  That's a huge cost man, it better be useful!

  After a short complain-fest I went ahead and created a grass carpet. Easy to do actually: carpenter + random leaves + random grass = voilà!

  All I need now, is some bait for the slime. And since they eat anything dead, I know exactly what to use!

  God bless hoarders, am I right?

  I retrieved from my pockets the Bell Snake bones I had found earlier, and carefully placed them outside the hole's gap.

  Perfect.

  All that's left to do now was to wait for the emerald blob to serve itself to me.

  No silver platter needed, dear slime.

  And please, for the love of boredom, don’t make me wait too long.

  I think I repeated the word Boredom more times that I did Status Window in this new life.

  Can you blame me though? It was so overwhelming that I literally fell asleep.

  For how long?

  No idea, but hey, I have Poison Immunity through the Purity skill and a Satellite to watch my back, so a nap in a warm forest isn't uncalled for, is it now?

  ???????

  SWOOSH!

  ...

  PLOP!

  ...

  "Ah? What? Who there?"

  The sound of ruffling leaves alongside with a wet smack had awakened me.

  Thanks to Satellite, who dashed right in my face jiggling like an excited puppy I didn't forget that I'm in the forest, attempting to complete the Guild's Initiation Quest.

  "Right, the slime trap"

  I took off the remaining grass cover and saw it, in his full gelatinous glory!

  Green Slime

  Age: 5 Years

  Level: 5

  Skills: Swift Regeneration, Nimble & Dissolve

  Let's gooo!

  Two thirds of the quest are completed!

  High five satellite!

  My palm and Satelite had clashed against each other, making a loud 'tssss'.

  "Ouch, ouch, ouch!"

  "Bad idea, bad idea!"

  Note to self: Don't do high fives with fire-rocks.

  After a quick discovery of the 'Create Water' spell to calm the burn on my hand and wrapping it with a makeshift leaf-bandage, I moved on to the next task.

  "Hey, my shiny amigo, can you go find another slime please?"

  The ball of fire nodded and swooshed away. I shoved the second slime in muh bag, and followed in the firesteps of my magical ally.

  You'd expect the slimes, which are mostly liquid, to be heavy.

  I mean, think about it! A volleyball filled with water? I'd have troubles with it, although minimal, but still troubles.

  However, the bag was barely heavier than five kilograms.

  Other than the stupid game of cat & mouse, this quest is gonna be easy!

  And so, the hunt for the third and final slime begun.