Chapter Nine – Abba, Father

  Fragment – retrieved from the writings of Emzara, compiled by Dinyah daughter of Arpakshad.

  Emzara had been with us barely a month and Na’amah recognised that like us, Na'amah and I, she was gifted, able to read and write, quick to learn and pick up languages. Not many women had this gift, nor were they inclined to pursue it. During our days of purification it was our joy to spend time in learning and recording stories, poems and songs. We taught all women and girls to memorize teaching stories orally, but only a select few were trained in the ways of the scribe. Those few women transcribed these stories and passed them down through the generations, often secretly, hidden amongst their linen and jewels, or in the cave tombs of our ancestors; so that one-day they would be found.

  The history of men records wars, battles, mighty men and the rise and fall of kingdoms. The stories of women record the gentle, daily experiences of those who bring and protect life, though impacted by historical events and traded as political pawns in arranged marriages, our contributions and subtle ministrations were ignored or hidden in the writings of conquest. But rest assured women throughout time will continue to act as witnesses and counter balances to the exploits of men of war.

  Na’amah and I knew that Yahuah held Emzara’s destiny in His hands, but she was a child traumatised. How could she not be? Her father was the first dictator, the first self-appointed king who modelled his vicious kingdom on the pre-flood kingdoms of the Nephiliym.

  We encouraged Emzara to write a daily journal, record her dreams. I would help her with that. This fragment was found in a chest she left behind at her marriage, and now it is returning to her along with Na’amah’s writings, to pass on to the next child that shows the mark of the poet or scribe, a pattern that was birthed with the extraordinary life of Na’amah. How a child, a female child born into evil, corrupted by the lies of the adversary, Azazel and seduced by the ways of the world, can be recruited and find refuge and purpose under the wings of the Most High, El Shaddai.

  * * * * * * * * * * * *

  Iyar - May

  2240 BC

  Emzara

  I feel Noachs hand, hard as the branch of a tree, whip my behind and I stagger forward wailing with shock.

  Don’t you ever speak about your father like that again,

  He says gruffly, his deep voice grim but steady, not loud. He doesn’t yell like my father.

  But I speak truth Grandfather. I hate him. He is cruel and mean. He killed my little Nunu, my baby monkey, even though he gave me Nunu himself, a gift from a foreign ambassador. He was just a baby. He didn’t mean to bite him. Papa scared him.

  My voice is getting screechy like my mother’s when she fights with my father, but I am determined not to cry.

  He threw Nunu against a wall and smashed his head open. His brains spilled out and the light went out of his eyes. Nunu was looking at me as he died. He was just a baby, a sweet baby; He had no mother, he only had me. I started screaming. I couldn’t stop. Papa called me a brat and told my amah to take me from his sight before he threw me against a wall too.

  Noach bends down to my level, taking hold of my shoulders and looks sadly into my eyes. Then he takes me into his arms. I cannot help myself I start sobbing. For everything: for being abandoned by my mother, my amah, missing my life, my friends from the city, for eating different food, and being in a different place so far from what I know.

  I am sorry that your father has done such a thing to hurt you child. Sometimes even adults can act rashly and do things that they then regret greatly. Did your father express any remorse for his actions?

  He didn’t say sorry. He had Uncle Mizraim bring me a cat from the southern lands. I miss my cat too.

  I start to sniffle again,

  I want to go home.

  Aren’t you happy here with Grandmother Na’amah and I? I know it’s strange and different but you will get used to it, in time. Just give yourself time to settle in poppet, yakiri.

  He wipes my grimy face with his sleeve and picks me up. He knows I like that. He is so tall and strong, like a tree. I am comforted as I stroke his thick white beard He scrunches up his face to make the wrinkles move around, his eyebrows go up and down, he makes me laugh.

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  Listen to me little one. Spirit has called you to us so you can learn The Creator’s ways. It will be different to Babel but it is a privilege. We must honour our parents, even if they have not been all that we would wish, even if they make mistakes. We all make mistakes and Yahuah would have us forgive, as he forgives us daily. A gentle tongue is a tree of life that speaks wisdom my child.

  I know! His face lights up,

  One of my prize sheep dogs will have a litter very soon. How about you have first pick of the puppies? I will teach you how to train a good working dog, to protect you, and to be your special friend?

  Okay grandfather Noach, I sniffle.

  I kiss his cheek and snuggle into his shoulder. He smells good, like the earth, a man smell and the fragrant oils that I’ve seen grandmother, my sivata, rub into his hair and beard.

  * * * * * * * * * * * *

  A personal note to Emzara.

  How I miss those days when you came to us as a child Emzara. Na’amah wanted you to know how precious you were to her. She wanted you to know that you were a child after her own heart, you followed in her pattern, and you understood each other. She always said that you were such a bold and forthright child and that she was more reserved and watchful, but that many things that happened to her, also happened to you: coming to live with a grandparent after being born into the thread of evil, at the centre of worldly and spiritual warfare, marrying young at fifteen, and of course: your fathers.

  She wanted to remind you that El is your Father and He will never fail you.

  You found a righteous father figure in Noach; she found one in Methuselach and to some extent the great Enoch. She experienced love with her first husband, Noach’s uncle, Feledi, and she was overjoyed to hear that you found happiness with your husband Kaber. She was concerned that Nimrod had forced you into a marriage with one of his evil cohort, but you tricked him by pretending to prefer Hunor, your half brother, knowing he would perversely and cruelly betroth you to the older (and wiser) Kaber, just to spite you and Na’amah.

  Na’amah was proud of you, that you trusted the dreams that came to you from Yahuah, and you played your father wisely even though you were just fifteen years old. When a snake asks you questions, they will always involve trickery and deceit; they will cause you to doubt yourself. You responded as the vulnerable and dutiful daughter, and Nimrod ever the tyrant thought he was in total control.

  Na’amah understood that fifteen-year-old girls are currency in a fallen world, gifted, exchanged and negotiated over by fathers who often view them as chattels. Chuah’s curse was felt by every woman in the old world and the new, raised to supply heirs, no longer seen as flesh of their flesh and bone of their bone. A loving, kind husband is indeed a blessing, one who views his woman, his daughters, his sisters as El intended; to be protected and cherished. How often has a woman been disappointed?

  When she released you to your fathers care to be married, her heart ached, but she prayed for you without ceasing and cherished the memories she had of you. How you loved that first puppy, little Yalla. You bought out something gentle and sweet in Noach that Na’amah had not seen with his sons, especially when he taught you how to train the puppy. Sadly Yalla died just before you left to be married, but I heard that Kaber got you another dog? And now you are a mother.

  There were so many things that Na’amah did not get to share with you in person, but she has written them down for you. Her time in The Valley of the First Fathers, her time with Chuah, and her first marriage. She has also written about the times that the ways of the world called her into temptation. To some they might appear like times of adventure, drama and excitement, but she wanted you to cherish the times that appear small and ordinary, to express gratitude for the little miracles, for every new day you draw breath.

  Whether you are in the confines of an ark, the safe havens of the people of The Way, or whether you are moving through the world that is ruled by the dark principalities, know that you belong to Him. Acknowledge Him in all your ways, continue to be obedient to His dreams, the nudges of spirit, pray and keep the appointed times, the moedim; and know that you are safe in the shadow of His wings.

  The priests and priestesses (The Mothers of Darkness) of the Brotherhood of the Snake are in full operation again, they change their names , they morph and shift like shadows on water, but you will know when they come to you. They will come to you with flattery and deceit; they will offer you knowledge and power, riches and status, but like their leader Azazel and the nephiliym ruach that they allow to possess their bodies, they are liars, not to be trusted. Na’amah shares her story so that you will not make the same mistakes that she did.

  Yet know also that patterns repeat themselves like strangler vines around a tall, healthy tree. The sins of the fathers (and mothers) penetrate the seed over four generations, not diminishing or fading, but escalating, growing, spreading like the mustard plant.

  If you should fall through word or deed, opening doorways for demon nephiliym spirits to enter into your soul and spirit, you have only to repent and cleanse your mind through prayer. Acknowledge your actions and faults and each day grow in holiness, even if the world continues to corrupt the sacred, to turn from the One God, to worship themselves, through witchcraft, divination and sacrificing their own children to the insatiable pantheon of demon gods that with Babel have spread across the plane of the earth. They may have different names for different regions in their new languages but know this: they are all the same.

  They are Azazels’s minions, playing at being gods, and the One True God limits their time to wreak havoc and depravity. They hate humanity with an eternal passion and seek to prohibit the coming of the melekh mashiach. The child you carry is part of this lineage. You dreamt it. You saw it in a vision, many times.

  Forgive me for always mentoring you; you are now a wife and a mother, what a blessing. But learn from Na’amah, who came to wisdom after a long road and a lifetime, which we can barely contemplate let alone comprehend. We could live to be one hundred and twenty years, Yahuah has allotted us no more, but Na’amah lived nearly a thousand years.

  Her dying words:

  What are riches and beauty, fame and fortune in a world that will be rolled up like a traveller’s rug?

  I have seen all the stars fall out of the sky

  I have seen the love and mercy of El Shaddai

  What can we take with us to the glorious city of Eternity?

  Why do we grasp and strive here on earth when everything is promised to us?

  If we can but trust.

  We are nothing without the Father who made us all.

  Walk with Him always.

  Look to Him always.

  Her face was alight with an ecstatic peace when she passed. Noach has been grieving her the past month. Here Emzara are her words, her heart, her testimony.

  May her memory be a blessing.