“Well—you certainly have an interesting friend there. I take it you guys don’t have a sexual harassment policy or… I don’t know, whatever your version of a human resources department would be.”

  Tiff gave Nick a puzzled look.

  “Why would we need to source humans, let alone have a department for it?”

  Nick palmed his face, trying not to laugh.

  “It’s not about sourcing humans. It’s for reporting work issues or co?workers giving you problems,” he explained with comical seriousness.

  “Wait—someone’s bothering you? Do you want me to take care of them?” She cracked her knuckles, ready to intimidate someone.

  Nick’s mouth went slack.

  “Nooooo, no, no, no… I meant Alice’s advances. Back on Earth, that kind of thing is frowned on in the workplace. I didn’t mind, but I didn’t want to cause trouble between you two.”

  “Oh—you’re fine. Alice is just being Alice…” Tiff muttered under her breath. “Horny?ass Moon hares…”

  Nick chortled at the grumble, amused by her exasperation.

  “I kinda expected you to be more… territorial.”

  Tiff shrugged, tearing bread and nibbling contentedly.

  “If you mean my outburst with Moyra, I already apologized. It was unprofessional and wrong.” Nick broke his bread, cleaning the last of his soup.

  “I was wrong to promise her a date—even if I didn’t mean me as the date. So it’s partly my fault too.”

  Tiff nodded, tearing another piece with a smile.

  “What’s done is done. But I trust Alice with my life. Even if you two did… IT… I’d just want to be part of it. No secrets.”

  Nick nearly choked on his bread at her last words, which won him a leeze from Tiff—that sneeze?growl?laugh mix he’d grown to love more than anything. Nearly choking was worth it just to hear that goofy sound again, the one that told him she was genuinely happy.

  “So, what’s on the agenda today?” Nick asked, polishing off his bowl with the last of the bread.

  Tiff finished her meal, then stood and gathered Nick’s tray along with her own, carrying them to the wash station—a large counter with a bathtub?sized basin set into the center. She dropped everything in, and the system came to life. Nick stood beside her, watching as the dishes floated, sterilized themselves clean, and then disappeared as the basin opened. The now?clean dishes drifted down into what looked like a hovering pool of dark fluid and vanished. A moment later, the bottom of the basin closed again, looking once more like an ordinary oversized sink.

  “What just happened?” Nick asked, more intrigued than anything.

  Tiff smiled and bumped him with her hip, knocking him slightly off balance.

  “Where did the stuff go?” he asked.

  She pointed her thumb over her shoulder toward the serving area. Nick followed her gesture, watching as that same dark fluid hovered over the trays, bowls, and utensil racks. Clean dishes dropped neatly back into place among the stacks of unused ones.

  “Transfer fluid,” Tiff said. “It’s programmable portals—gates with fixed, predetermined locations.” She pointed at the basin, then back to the serving area. “Beginning, end. Predetermined and fixed. That simple.” She wore a grin like she’d just explained the meaning of existence.

  “Wow… can I get one of these for the house?”

  “Nope—not allowed. You have to stay here to keep the neat tech.” She snickered, flashing a toothy grin.

  “Well, how does it work…?”

  Her face went blank. After a beat, she walked past him. “Dunno. Ask Alice. But to answer your other question—it’s time to put it on…” she called as she headed out of the mess hall.

  “Huh? Put what on?” Nick asked.

  She stopped and looked back over her shoulder. “The last suit you’ll ever wear…”

  “Whoa! Really!? We’re that type of group?!”

  She let out a leeze at his serious tone, clearly enjoying herself.

  “No — that was… I think you’d call it a joke,” she choked out, getting her fit under control.

  “Was it funny?” she asked, wiping a tear from her eye.

  “No,” he replied, stone?faced.

  Her ears drooped slightly as they moved briskly through the halls.

  “I was returning your joke. It was kinda funny, I’ll give you that,” he said with a small smile.

  Her ears perked back up, her tail sweeping side to side as a slight smile crept across her face while they continued down the hallway.

  “But seriously — where are we going?” Nick asked.

  She stayed silent, that same smug smile creeping over her face a she led the way down the hallway.

  As they wound through the corridors, she stopped at a door with a polished brass?looking plaque beside it. Tiff lifted a fist to knock, but before she even touched the surface, the auto?lock disengaged and the door split apart.

  *Thunk—Whoosh—*

  Tiff froze, blank?faced, fist still raised to knock on the now?open door.

  “Come in,” spoke a commanding yet whimsical voice from within.

  Zurii’s invitation snapped Tiff out of her brief daze. She looked down as she felt something nudging her—it was Nick elbowing her in the side.

  “What’s the matter? Never been to the principal’s office?” Nick whispered conspiratorially.

  “Either come in or don’t—don’t just stand there with the door open,” called Zurii from her desk chair as she gazed out the window, a bit of iron in her tone this time.

  They stepped into a large office decorated with holo?pics, degrees, and plaques, along with a few odd objects Nick could only assume were mementos or trophies.

  *—Kathunk*

  Nick paused at a bleached?white skull mounted on the wall—something like a thick bear skull, if a bear skull were taller than he was, dwarfing everything else on display. Embedded into the mounted trophy was a small plaque:

  *We, the People of Sans, present this trophy as a memorial to Zurii Cringindger, her brave crew, and the men and women who perished before and during the battle against The Shadow of the Forest—a terror that claimed so many of our people. You stepped in when our pleas were ignored. With deepest gratitude: Governor Mash.*

  “So… I take it you’ve made your decision?” Zurii called from her chair, still facing the window, her gaze fixed on the void. Outside, a slow chunk of rock drifted past, colliding with another. A blue ripple shimmered as the larger stone drifted toward the ship and was reduced to nothing by the ship’s field.

  Her voice snapped Nick out of his reverie. He crossed to the plush Grinshawd?leather couch, where Tiff smiled and patted the spot beside her. He sat at the far end, trying to be professional, giving her space. The couch, however, had other plans. Tiffany’s weight sank deep into the cushions, concaving them into a hollow that drew him inevitably toward her thigh, sliding him into her side as though gravity itself had claimed him. Her face remained stone, eyes drifting to the small man now wedged against her, practically in her lap. Nick didn’t need to look to know what she was feeling—her tail betrayed her, hammering a heavy *thump?thump?thump?thump* against the edge of the backless couch?bench.

  The back of Zurii’s hovering chair began to spin. Before Nick could react, Tiffany shot upright with a crisp salute. The sudden motion launched him sideways, and he scrambled to recover, springing up beside her in a half?stumble that somehow resembled a salute stance.

  Zurii turned to face them, her cheerful expression collapsing into flat disbelief. Her black eyes widened, molten?gold irises flicking between the two before she closed her eyes, rubbing her temples. The splines atop her head flattened as she dragged her hands down her face.

  “Oh, fantastic—this is getting out of hand,” she groaned. “Now there are two of them.” She muttered, flicking a finger at Tiffany. “Day one, and you’re already corrupting him? We’ve been over this—no saluting in private. Ever. In public, I’ll only accept it if decorum dictates. Now... down to business.” She motioned calmly for the duo to sit again.

  Nick waved a hand in a small flourish. “These are not the salutes you thought you saw.”

  Zurii arched a rinstone eyebrow, fixing him with a cool stare. “Mind tricks don’t work on me, sir Dickson. Sit.”

  She eyed Tiff, making the large Lupas’s fur bristle.

  “Is he always like this?”

  Tiff nodded solemnly. “Yes, Ms—” Zurii’s slight glare made her correct herself. “I mean—Zurii, yes he is.”

  Tiff’s face softened as she looked down at the human smooshed against her thigh. “But I like that about him. He makes me... laugh.”

  Zurii’s expression eased as her gaze shifted to Nick. “That can be a good thing. Heaven knows, when someone obsesses too much over duty, they forget how to enjoy the small things—the things that keep us sane. Thank you, sir, for reminding my girl of that. She can be... quite a handful.”

  This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

  Nick nodded, pushing his wise?cracking side down hard—at least outside his head. His gaze slid to the side, eyeing Tiff’s chest at head level.

  Handful...? That’s the understatement of the year. I don’t have enough hands for those things. The thought flashed through him, his face turning red for a brief moment before he forced himself back into business mode.

  As if reading his mind, Tiff—without a glance—gently thwapped him on the back of the head with her bushy tail. Her gaze and the rest of her body remained unmoving, a sentry focused on Zurii.

  “It’s been a pleasure to meet you all, and to even be acknowledged here—it’s definitely a welcome change of pace. I just hope I can meet your expectations.”

  “I take it this means you’ve decided to join us, Mr. Dixion?” A warm smile spread over Zurii’s face as he nodded in response.

  “I’m sure you will and then some, Mr. Dixion... Now, let’s go over your registration and put you into the system.”

  Nick, however, felt hollow. He had already been through so much, and words seemed inadequate. Any human would still be in disbelief—flabbergasted, even—to find themselves in space, surrounded by aliens, let alone chosen to work alongside them.

  Zurii slid out of her chair, which gave a soft hum as it lifted slightly once she stepped away. She brought a tablet to Nick and handed it to him. What looked like a glass or plastic screen felt different—its cold chill was like polished quartz. Zurii left Nick to stand in front of Tiffany, who watched her with curiosity.

  “Yes—? Director Zurii?” Tiff asked, wondering what was going through her boss’s head.

  “Tiffany Raforus—” Zurii lifted her hands to the Lupas’s face, smooshing her fluffy cheeks with both palms. “You’re such a good girl. I’m very proud of you—as both a supervisor and a guardian.”

  Tiff’s tail started its slow, heavy *thump?thump?thump?thump* against the backless couch. Zurii released her cheeks and looked over at the human scrolling through the paperwork. “Nick,” she said softly.

  “Yes, Director Zurii?” He looked toward her, setting the device aside. She smiled at him, then reached up to scratch behind the base of Tiffany’s right ear with her sharp, black nails. Tiff’s eyes rolled back as her tail went rigid, her left hind paw tapping heavily against the white tile floor of the office.

  “If our girl is ever distraught, this always cheers her up. Take extra good care of my young one.” She winked as she stopped scratching. Tiff’s paw fell silent, her tail drooped off the seat, and her ears flattened slightly as her eyes returned to normal.

  Zurii sat next to the human as he picked up the tablet again.

  “So, do you have any questions? It’s a basic registration form. You’ll have a probation period—five Macro cycles, our time. That’s about six months in Earther time. Then a two?cycle contract—about two years your time. After that, you’ll be freelance and can go where you want...” She paused, glancing at Tiff, who watched them with anxious eyes. “Or you can stay, for however long you want. We have a really good retirement plan—if you survive the job.” Zurii gave him a light jab in the shoulder at the last part, trying to make him feel comfortable and at home.

  “Okay, I’m game. What do you need me to do?”

  Tiff’s tail resumed its heavy assault on the furniture as her eyes lit up at his response.

  “If you agree, place your hand on the surface of the data slate. Your biometrics will serve as your ID, and I’ll fast?track everything else so you’re free to settle in. Since Tiffany already ran you through a quick trial by fire, you can skip the academy. Classes will still be required to help you acclimate—they’re short. Once your standard?issue neurolink cable and chip baseplate are installed, you’ll be able to uplink the classes, our procedures, standards, advanced combat training, and, if you have the attitude, technical skills.”

  Nick placed his palm on the quartz?like screen, which lit up green. A shimmer of light swept from top to bottom, reading and adding him to the system. A pleasant beep confirmed his registration was complete.

  “Good—” Zurii reached over, took the data slate from Nick, and returned to her seat.

  “You’ve already met one of our new transplants. Tiff will show you the equipment bay. Splicer will issue your comm and put you under for your augments.”

  Tiffany’s eyes grew wide at the sound of the tech’s name.

  “Oh! He’s officially staffed now and not a floater?” she asked excitedly.

  Zurii nodded with a smile, watching Tiff calm down slightly, clearly tickled by the Lupas’s surprise.

  “Yes—he wanted a permanent station instead of traveling as an installer, so we worked with him.”

  Tiff and Nick exchanged a brief glance.

  “So... how bad does it hurt? I’ve never been a fan of surgeries.” Nick asked, looking up at her as Zurii continued transferring data from the slate to the crystal inlay on her desk, typing steadily as she finalized his enrollment and approved his parts and equipment.

  “Honestly—” Tiff tilted her head in thought, ticking a claw against a protruding canine the way she always did when deep in thought. “You won’t feel a thing. Most of the time I’ve slept through the procedures. The times I was awake... well, the smell of burning flesh made me a little hungry, but other than that.”

  While the two made small talk, Zurii looked up from her typing to interrupt.

  “So... you’ll be on ship for a while before going back home to finish the mission. Do you want your own cabin, or would you rather a bunkmate?”

  At this, both stared at her blankly. Tiff’s floofy tail curled around Nick, gently pulling him into her lap, her arms wrapping around his waist as if to shield him. Zurii paused, staring back at them before returning to her typing.

  “I suppose that was a silly question... Nick, you have a say in this too.”

  He nodded, understanding. Nick agreed he didn’t mind a bunkmate—especially given that he knew who that bunkmate would be. Even if it felt forced with Tiff embracing him the way she did, he was sure that if he pressed the issue she would relent and he could get his own cabin... but as he sat clutched in her lap, he remembered the promise he’d made—to share her cabin, not as some wiggle?room arrangement like Moyra’s, but as her partner. This time, he meant it. The thought settled him. He welcomed the company. To him, it was nice to be appreciated, wanted—something he had almost forgotten after living alone for so long.

  He looked up at her while nestling into her warm, soft bosom. She pulled him closer, enveloping him in her warmth. He glanced back at Zurii, who was still typing, his thoughts drifting into nothingness, lost in the calmness of the moment. Then he was briefly shaken by the heavy weight resting on his head. It took a moment to register what it was—Tiffany’s muzzle. She gently nuzzled the top of his head, ruffling his hair slightly as she breathed, before both of them sank back into serenity, enjoying each other in the quiet with only the *tick?tick?tacking* of Zurii’s nails against the polished quartz inlay on her desk.

  Her eyes flicked toward the two; a glimmer of a smile came and went as she finished the paperwork. Reclining back in her chair, she eyed them—comforting each other as if in a power nap.

  ““My— I see you’re quick to adjust...”” Zurii said, a curt grin appearing at the corner of her mouth, rustling the two from their warm bubble.

  Tiff quickly sat upright, pushing Nick to the side in one gentle, fluid motion. The two sat side by side, as if Zurii hadn’t seen what she clearly had. As much as Zurii tried to stop herself, she couldn’t hold back the chortle that slowly broke free.

  “Phfft?ha! You two are too much... well, looks like that’s it here. Tiff can take you to get everything lined out, so unless you need anything else, you’re dismissed.”

  Tiffany closed her eyes as she shook her head, then looked down at Nick waiting patiently.

  “Thanks a lot, Ms. Zurii, ma’am... I’ll do my best to make y’all proud. I do have one question—if you’re not busy.”

  Zurii sat up in her chair, propping her elbows on the desk with her fingers clasped beneath her chin. “Yes? I have nothing pressing at the moment—subject to change, mind you.” The shifting gold in her eyes fixed curiously on Nick.

  He lightly jabbed a thumb behind him at the massive skull mounted across the wall.

  “I’d love to hear the story about The Shadow of the Forest, if you have the time and feel like telling it.”

  She smiled at this, slightly solemn in her demeanor, sitting straighter in her chair. “Serbal, could we have some refreshments for our guest, please?”

  A Jarvis?styled droid dropped from the wall, took everyone’s orders, and returned with refreshments for the tale ahead.

  Zurii cradled her cup, her gaze lingering on the massive skull. “This tale will give you a taste of what awaits. If you choose to leave after, I won’t begrudge you.”