“Curse the sun!” my wife groaned, rolling over and pulling the duvet over her head. I agreed, but knew we needed to get up and get caffeinated because we had something to accomplish.

  I had no idea how to defeat an enemy made of wine and coffee grounds, but maybe once Harley was energized, she’d figure out something crafty to do with the monster of the day.

  I puttered around the kitchen, getting breakfast going while Harley showered. Then I switched places with her and admired my wife’s window patch job. The broken window would be an ordeal to replace, but maybe if the weather warmed up soon—

  I cut off that line of thinking since our Slayer Auld would melt once the temperature got above freezing, and we needed his help to defeat the Murder Goo.

  Today. We had to finish this today.

  When I returned to the kitchen, Harley had my second cup of coffee ready and was pulling the frittata out of the oven. It smelled like heaven. Honey ham, green onion, spinach, and Swiss cheese combined for the perfect start to our day.

  “Harley, you’re caffeinated and bolstered with egg, so tell me you have some Invento-Weapon ideas for how to deal with a coffee abomination.”

  “Me!?” my wife countered. “I’m not the one with the super brain. Can’t you… ya know? Math it or something?”

  A laugh bubbled out of my lips as my eyebrows screwed up, “‘Math it?’ How exactly do you think I’m going to calculate the death of a fiend made of magic, wine, and used coffee grounds? Calculate the probability of its demise?"

  “Hmmm,” I murmured, tapping my lips with one finger. "I’d say since we are 2-0 at monster elimination, the thing is going down. But how that is going to occur is most likely something inventive, creative, and having nothing to do with plots and plans. Spontaneity is your area, wifey, so get to doing what you do best: being you.”

  Harley grinned. “Carte blanche? No negotiation? I just go off and pull a Harley?”

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  “Not without me, but I say we suit up so we’re prepared with the not-quite-body-armor black gear we got for Yule.”

  “I’m game!”

  Minutes later, Harley was looking full Barbytron in a black, fitted super-suit with green lines, and I was similarly clad in mine with red stripes. It had a holiday vibe that was almost out of season, considering it was New Year’s Day, but hopefully the good folks of Seattle would think we were cosplayers and overlook the oddity.

  The suits themselves were plenty warm, so we didn’t bother with coats, despite the outdoor temperatures in the twenties. When we stepped onto the porch, Auld struck a pose worthy of the title ‘rock star,’ and Harley ran to him.

  Hell's bells! My wife was a fan girl. Auld picked her up and spun her around as she giggled at him. Good god, this scene was ridiculous.

  And rather precious. I took a mental snapshot to save it for all eternity. My wife in the arms of a handsome ice devil.

  “You ready to slay the baddy, Auld?” Harley asked the frozen figure.

  Auld’s normally expressive face grew serious. “I think this is dangerous, friends. We don’t know where the Murder Goo is hiding, but it’s probably somewhere dark and dank. Humans can drown in coffee muck.”

  “We aren’t your average gals, Auld. We’ve faced down a Murder Pizza and Yule Log and walked away unscathed. We’re at full power with back-up magic candy canes. Plus, we’ve got these handy icicle swords that I’ve primed with Invento-Weapon and Glimmer Reverb abilities, so they’re ready to go when we need to put them to use. The three of us together are stronger than any of us apart, so I say we charge after this thing and end it before it has the chance to get any more vicious.”

  Now that was a thought I did not like considering, so I joined the giant snow angel and my wife in walking down the sidewalk.

  “It left a faint trail as it retreated last night,” Auld pointed to the streak of coffee grounds on the sidewalk. There were few people milling about, and I saw some curtains drawn back, but I supposed Seattle decided we were on our way to a con or party wearing costumes.

  Auld was so spectacular I couldn’t imagine anyone coming up with an outfit that magnificent, but people had ways of convincing themselves that something unbelievable wasn’t what they were seeing, so no one stopped us.

  The trail led us to the last place I wanted to go, and Harley took a step back.

  “No way,” she said, shaking her head. “There’s gotta be another plan, Auld. We. . . lure it out. I’ll be bait. Nice tasty Harley snack, brimming with magic. Come on, fell coffee beast! I’m up here. In the light of day. Come out, come out, wherever you are!” she sang to no avail.

  “Got another strategy, Har? That one doesn’t seem to be working,” I drolled.

  “Anything but this, Red. That is not a place humans were meant to go.”

  Auld grinned, bent down in the middle of the street, plucked the manhole cover off the sewer, and jumped.