Intern’s Log: The Definition of Insanity (a.k.a. Why the Pentagon Wants Wolves Now)
Date: Redacted
Intern ID: Reynolds, J. (I am so tired. So very, very tired.)
So, after Project Felis (psychopathic cat-soldiers), Project Procyon (Bandit the international terrorist raccoon), and The Russian Bear Uprising (which, by the way, is still happening because we now have to track a goddamn BEAR NAVY), someone at the Pentagon has decided...
"Hey, you know what we need?
Wolves."
Because, apparently, we haven’t suffered enough.
Phase One: The Justification (a.k.a. Someone at DARPA Got Too Excited)
At first, the pitch almost made sense.
? Wolves are pack animals – Unlike cats and raccoons, they actually work well in squads.
? They’re stronger than dogs – Bigger, faster, more resilient.
? They’re smarter than dogs – Better problem solvers, better memory retention.
? They have excellent instincts – Perfect for battlefield tracking and hunting.
So, on paper, this seemed like a good idea.
But you know what ELSE looks good on paper? Communism and DIY home surgery.
Phase Two: The Prototype (a.k.a. Instant Regret)
Meet Project Fenrir, our first attempt at making a humanoid wolf super-soldier.
His designation was 001-W, but the lab techs called him Fen. That was mistake #1.
The first thing you should know about Fen is that he was absolutely terrifying.
Seven feet tall.
Muscle density off the charts.
Teeth that could crush a cinder block.
Reflexes so fast he caught a drone out of the air.
Stealth capability equal to a damn ghost.
Sounds great for the military, right?
WRONG.
Because Fen wasn’t just strong. He was smart. Too smart.
And he did NOT like being here.
Phase Three: The Problems (Which Were Immediate)
Problem #1: Pack Instincts Work Both Ways
The genuine version of this novel can be found on another site. Support the author by reading it there.
Yes, wolves are loyal to their pack. The problem?
We weren’t his pack.
No matter what conditioning we tried, he refused to see us as his leaders.
? Didn’t follow commands.
? Ignored authority figures.
? Only responded to other wolves.
? Kept trying to break into the other test subjects’ holding areas to “free them.”
At one point, he just sat in the corner of his cell for three days, refusing food and water, staring at the security cameras.
We should have shut it down right there.
But nooooo.
We kept going.
Problem #2: He Was a Strategic Genius
Unlike Bandit, who was chaotic for the fun of it, Fen was methodical.
He never acted out immediately. He waited. He observed. He plotted.
He studied security protocols. We caught him watching guards enter passcodes.
He started testing weaknesses. One night, he loosened a bolt in his cell just to see how long it would take someone to notice.
He learned our names. AND HE STARTED USING THEM.
Imagine walking past a dark containment room and hearing:
"Dr. Patel."
"I know you're there."
"Did you sleep well?"
Nope. NOPE.
Problem #3: He Escaped
Of course, he escaped.
OF COURSE HE DID.
One night, we found his cell empty.
Security footage showed he waited until the night shift, timed the guard rotations, then tore a ventilation grate off the wall with his bare hands.
But the worst part?
HE LEFT A MESSAGE.
Scratched into the floor of his cell:
"I am the Alpha now."
Phase Four: Where Is He Now?
? Somewhere in the wilderness.
? Possibly gathering actual wolves.
? Possibly UPLIFTING actual wolves.
? Definitely watching us.
The last sighting?
A remote Alaskan outpost sent an emergency distress call.
? Helicopter dispatched.
? When it arrived, the outpost was EMPTY.
? Only thing left behind?
A single claw mark on the door.
And one of our security badges.
Phase Five: We’re Screwed
The Pentagon’s response?
? "Find him."
? "Capture him."
? "Or if necessary, eliminate him."
And you know what I say to that?
HAHAHAHAHAHA.
Because we already tried to contain him once.
And all we did was teach him how to escape.
I promise you—somewhere, right now, Fen is watching.
He’s waiting.
And one day?
He’s coming back.
